Eula May Goes to the Publisher

Hurray!  Tomorrow I'm submitting to the publisher my self formatted interior and cover for my new book, Eula May and the Flim Flam Nun.  It's a funny mystery with romantic overtones.  I've been told by experts (all family members) that it's the best book they've ever read--had them rolling on the floor with laughter when their hearts and other parts weren't pitty-pattying for love and weddings.  
       Writing can be lots of fun.  You get to dream up characters, just like you, who look terrific and have wonderful things happen to them.  And then there is the flipside, you can pay back (anonymously of course) all your enemies by writing about terrible misfortunes that happen to them in your book.  Ah, but I would never do that, would I?  I guess you'll have to read my book to find out.
        If you would like to write--a book, a play, a script, or even a letter--I need to warn you what happens when you start your project.  Up until now your computer has been a fairly good and faithful servant, sending and receiving emails, finding out important information on internet searches--such as how old is she anyway.  But the minute you embark on A WRITING PROJECT, 
            the evil b*st*ard that lives in your computer 
takes over.  You may beg, cry, scream, curse, even unplug the computer, and when forced by despair, remove the battery and wait five minutes.  Nothing will work. You have to find another way of doing what the manual says is easy.
      This is why only truly creative people can write anything.  You must be truly creative to come up with clever ways around the destructive roadblocks
            the evil b*st*ard that lives in your computer 
will put in your path to authorship.   Of course there is another way to deal with this vicious problem and I will discuss it in a future blog.
     In the meantime, I'd like to hear stories from anyone else who has an evil b*st*ard that lives in your computer.   But no bad words, please.  I only used this one, to get your attention.  Now that I have it, I won't need to resort to such weasley tactics.  I'd also like to know if weasley is a real word and if I've spelled it correctly.
     Send emails to afremgen@gmail.com. 
                                                                          The End